Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Fake it till you Make it!
By Mohnish Nair
As I sit down to share some thoughts with you today, I am blank. I don’t know where to start from? What should I write about? Should I write something that is inspiring or at least attempt to be inspiring? Or should I share about how I feel today about a particular subject? Or maybe I should just not write at all. Well as these questions keep playing around in my mind, I suddenly realize, who do I think I am? I am no trained or qualified writer. I definitely am no fool to think I have any command over writing my thoughts articulately. Why do I even think I can write? My grammar is all wrong and I find it utterly difficult to frame sentences and think about suitable words. Why am I unleashing this mercilessly jumbled bunch of alphabets on my poor dear bloggers?
As I continue to stare at the blank screen, slowly my nervousness subsides and my self deprecating original self starts withdrawing its tight grip of hands from the throat of my “Wannabe Motivator” alter ego. This change in my thought process happens because I am now reminded of what I read somewhere once i.e. “You have to fake it till you make it.” I know it sounds a bit cheap, but if you really give it a thought, it really makes sense. We all have been faking it until we make it. Remember the first few words you uttered as a toddler. Well I don’t know about you, but I don’t remember. Haha… However, my mum would always say that the first words that I ever uttered were “daddydaddydaddy…”or something like that. How do we as kids learn to speak? We listen to the sounds around us and then imitate the sounds till we start making sense out of them. That’s how we learnt to walk, to run, to write, to play. We have always been faking it first before making it. And so this self created theory pacifies my fear of writing and I now start punching the keys on my keyboard. Thoughts flow down from my brain into my hands and finally through my fingers onto the keyboard. I want to express myself and that is why I write. I write not to prove to anyone about my writing skills but just to express my point of view on a medium that has a far greater reach compared to anything that is physically possible.
Lets assume that my argument about human learning is correct as mentioned above, then I am now encouraged to believe that we can apply the same principle in our development as well. Since learning and development go hand in hand, I assume that if I start to imitate the most successful person in my field and do things that he or she is doing, slowly but steadily I may start developing the traits that the person possesses. This may eventually lead me to becoming what I desire to become. So if I want to be the most knowledgeable consultant in my field, I must just start imitating what the most knowledgeable person in my field is currently doing. If I want to be a painter I must start doing what the most successful painter that I admire does. Isn’t this a great way to reach to the top? Now critics would argue that this robs you of your individuality and uniqueness. If you imitate a person, you lose yourself. And I must say that is a valid point. But what if I imitate their actions and add something of my own to the delivery of the final act. So if I am an aspiring singer, I must follow the daily routines, the practice methods and the lifestyle habits of the most successful singer and improve my capability, but when it comes to performing I must sing in my own style. Now wouldn’t that be a fair way to get successful? So what I am actually doing is imitating the behavior that goes into making a great singer but not the style of a successful singer. This way I avoid myself from becoming a clone.
The same principle can be applied to our moods and emotions. If you are really sad and depressed, how would your body language be? You may walk looking down at the floor. If you are sitting, your shoulders would be droopy, your jaws would be hanging and your entire posture would be laidback. Your face would look all gloomy and grumpy. Now how do you change your state of mind to becoming happy? Well many would say, think positive thoughts. I have tried this, and I am sure you would agree with me, that when you are depressed, thinking positive thoughts is the last thing that you are capable of doing. So that option is null and void. I have a reverse idea. Now that you are sad and you are deep in your thoughts about how miserable your life is, I want you to just change your body language. Yes, all I want you to do when you are sad is, SMILE! Okay do it now…SMILE!! Now that you are faking a smile, hold the smiling posture of your lips and think about negative thoughts. You cant, can you? Well that is the magic of faking it until making it. The moment you smile, even if you are faking it, you cannot think negatively and your mood is uplifted. So the reverse works here. You have to control your actions to change your thoughts. Simple!
Now as I come to the end of this post, see how much I have written. Haven’t I really faked it till I have made it? I wrote an entire article by just pretending to be a writer..ha ha…!
So the next time you want to achieve something in life, or in your career, or if you simply want to feel happy and excited, I give you this secret, FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT!! A better way of doing it is believe in whatever you think you are faking. So when I think that I can be the most successful motivational speaker and writer in this world, I have to first follow the activities that the most successful motivational speakers and writers do and most importantly I should start believing that it will work. I must invest faith in my thoughts and desires. And that’s because if I don’t fake it with conviction, I will never make it! So a better way of achieving things is FAITH IT TILL YOU MAKE IT! You have to develop faith in what you desire to become, you have to develop faith in your capabilities and you have to develop faith that all will be well as per your desire!
All the best! :-)
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Happiness and things like that…
By Mohnish Nair
Happiness is a choice. Stop searching for it outside. Those who blame others will never find happiness. Stop expecting others to make you happy. You will not necessarily be happy if others make you happy. You will not necessarily be happy if others are happy. You will be happy only when you want to be happy. Yes! you must WANT to be happy. The people around you will only care about your unhappiness to a point. It is not necessary that everyone around you will be happy just because you are happy. You walk alone. Accept that you will always walk alone. There is nothing wrong in walking alone or being alone. If others join you, be happy, if they don’t, be happier.
Detachment is the secret to happiness. Stop being obsessed about people, material things and events. Things will happen when they have to happen whether you want it or not, whether you like it or not. Your desires won’t come true just by believing, they will come true by doing. Sometimes even doing does not guarantee that things will come true. Your choices decide your circumstance but your circumstance need not decide your choices. A man living in miserable conditions can make a choice to become the richest man in the world. A rich man cannot change the circumstance of a poor man if the poor man does not want his circumstance to be changed. You can only do something for others, but you need not necessarily make a change in their life unless they accept your offer to make a change. The goal of life is happiness however, happiness comes to those who decide to be happy where they are, how they are. When you expect others to please you, you will get disappointed. Disappointment leads to unhappiness. The source being you placed your faith in others to make you happy. They may not deliberately do something to make you unhappy; however, their action to create self-happiness could become a reason for your unhappiness. Each one of us has the right to make oneself happy. Don’t be upset with people who do things that upset you. They did it because they wanted to be happy. There is nothing wrong in wanting to be happy. Understand their point of view and be happy that they are happy.
Happiness lies in forgiving and detachment. That’s the ultimate secret. It lies in not expecting and it lies in doing things without any assumptions about the outcome. You need not search for reasons to be happy. You need not search for reasons to be unhappy. You only need to breathe in the moment and find happiness in the rhythm of your breath. Your breath is the gift from the almighty. It is the gift of nature. It is the rhythm of comic energies and it is in sync with all that is alive and moving. The rhythm in your breath is the same rhythm that runs in a stream, which moves in the wind, that vibrates in the mountains. The rhythm of your breath is part of what makes the earth go round and the moon move around us. The waves in the ocean carry the same frequency that your heartbeat carries. All you need to do is believe that you are one with nature and that you are in sync with all things natural. When you do this, you will find yourself rich, you will find yourself in oneness with the divine and you will find yourself happy. It doesn't take wealth to be happy but it takes happiness to create wealth. Sing your tune. Walk your path. Dance like a bird and you will see that all that you are is reason enough to be the happiest soul in this universe. Feel your breath, find your happiness.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Building Credibility at the Workplace
What separates the 'performers' from the 'average' at the workplace? Why is it that a few succeed to build an image of a winner while many toil very hard but yet fail to leave a lasting impression? I am sure you too have noticed that some individuals carry a halo of reliability around them and almost everybody seem to trust and bank on them for their ability to deliver. Therefore, I have listed down a few crucial traits that one must have to build a repute and credibility of a reliable executor.
1. Be a doer
In a competitive work environment that we live in today, it becomes pivotal to have a repute of a DOER than someone who merely passes off as just another employee. Employers seek out for performers who can deliver the goods every single time. They would want to have capable individuals who can match up to the organization's goals and also go the extra mile to ensure completion of projects successfully.
2. Mr. Dependable track record
The past history and the reputation of a person in the organization play a very important role while being selected in the core team of performers. It's no secret that those who can boast of "Mr. Dependable" credibility are the ones who find themselves moving up in the corporate world.
3. High personal standards
Always aim for excellence. Expect only the best from yourself and disallow mediocrity in your performance. Always focus on achieving the highest standards in whatever you do. Don't pass off anything as complete unless you think you couldn't have done it better.
4. Keep your word
A man is known by the word he keeps. Your reputation is built based on how much you walk the talk. Always remember the golden rule of DOING what you say you will do. Be obsessed about honoring your commitments.
5. Finish Line Habit
Another important trait necessary to build amazing credibility is to be known as someone who finishes what they start. It is important you take tasks and initiatives to their logical conclusions and not just keep on starting new things but never end up completing them.
6. Time Obsession
Your reputation grows when you respect deadlines and honor them. People who are punctual and time bound own the greatest ingredient of credibility building. Remember, you will be respected when you respect time.
You can build a great reputation for yourself if you follow all of the above suggestions at your workplace.
This article is written by Mohnish Nair. Mohnish is a business coach specialized in small and medium size enterprise coaching in India. A young, dynamic motivational speaker, creative designer and a strategic coach, Mohnish has helped hundreds of business owners transform their world creatively. That's Mohnish's motto in life, to transform the world creatively. Contact Mohnish by visiting his blogsite - http://www.mapledreamsindia.com or write to him at firstname.lastname@example.org
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7529610