Friday, July 31, 2009
Very often, the answer to the first "why" will prompt another "why" and the answer to the second "why" will prompt another and so on; hence the name the 5 Whys strategy.
Benefits of the 5 Whys include:
- It helps to quickly determine the root cause of a problem
- It is easy to learn and apply
How to use the 5 Whys:
When looking to solve a problem, start at the end result and work backward (toward the root cause), continually asking: "Why?" This will need to be repeated over and over until the root cause of the problem becomes apparent.
Following is an example of the 5 Whys analysis as an effective problem-solving technique:
- Why is our client, unhappy? Because we did not deliver our services when we said we would.
- Why were we unable to meet the agreed-upon timeline or schedule for delivery? The job took much longer than we thought it would.
- Why did it take so much longer? Because we underestimated the complexity of the job.
- Why did we underestimate the complexity of the job? Because we made a quick estimate of the time needed to complete it, and did not list the individual stages needed to complete the project.
- Why didn't we do this? Because we were running behind on other projects. We clearly need to review our time estimation and specification procedures.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
All the top salespeople ask good questions and listen carefully to the answers. One of the most important skills of listening is simply to pause before replying. When the prospect finishes talking, rather than jumping in with the first thing that you can think of, take three to five seconds to pause quietly and wait.
Becoming a Master of the Pause
All excellent listeners are masters of the pause. They are comfortable with silences. When the other person finishes speaking, they take a breath, relax and smile before saying anything. They know that the pause is a key part of good communications.
Three Benefits of Pausing
Pausing before you speak has three specific benefits. The first is that you avoid the risk of interrupting the prospect if he or she has just stopped to gather his or her thoughts. Remember, your primary job in the sales conversation is to build and maintain a high level of trust, and listening builds trust. When you pause for a few seconds, you often find the prospect will continue speaking. He will give you more information and further opportunity to listen, enabling you to gather more of the information you need to make the sale.
Carefully Consider What You Just Heard
The second benefit of pausing is that your silence tells the prospect that you are giving careful consideration to what he or she has just said. By carefully considering the other person's words, you are paying him or her a compliment. You are implicitly saying that you consider what he or she has said to be important and worthy of quiet reflection. You make the prospect feel more valuable with your silence. You raise his self-esteem and make him feel better about himself.
Understanding With Greater Efficiency
The third benefit of pausing before replying is that you will actually hear and understand the prospect better if you give his or her words a few seconds to soak into your mind. The more time you take to reflect upon what has just been said, the more conscious you will be of the their real meaning. You will be more alert to how his words can connect with other things you know about the prospect in relation to your product or service.
The Message You Send
When you pause, not only do you become a more thoughtful person, but you convey this to the customer. By extension, you become a more valuable person to do business with. And you achieve this by simply pausing for a few seconds before you reply after your prospect or customer has spoken.
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.First, take time to carefully consider what the customer just said and what he might mean by it. Pausing allows you to read between the lines.Second, show the customer that you really value what he has said by reflecting for a few moments before you reply.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
"Genius is eternal patience." - Michelangelo
Patience is the ability to slow down and wait. It is the ability to regulate negative emotions (anger and frustration). It is the ability to delay gratification and control impulses (what is said and done hastily). When we see people who are patient, we certainly value this quality and wish we were more skilled at it. We have respect for the individual who can deal with provocative and irritating situations with ease and grace. Patient people show more empathy and compassion towards others, and are more calm and perseverant.
We certainly have the opportunity to practice patience in our daily lives. A few common examples are: trying to find a parking place, waiting in a long postal queue, sitting in the doctors offices for hours, being put on hold via a computer-generated telephone message, getting passed from one person to another only to get cut off and end up having to go through the whole rigmarole again. Children and adolescents can also certainly try our patience beyond reckoning.
Tips for being patient with the world
- "Answer your emails only twice a day at scheduled times. Firstly, to check for urgent emails, and secondly, at time that you have scheduled after the important tasks have been done (this includes Facebook, Skype, MySpace, etc.). One of the biggest distracters and time wasters is to respond to emails as they come in, so disable the symbol and sound that notifies you when an email hits your inbox and better yet, turn the Internet off completely so you don't end up surfing the web. Make sure you have no distractions. The studies indicate that every email or anything else that interrupts you, takes 12-15 minutes to get back on track. The same goes for your child who is studying for exams and doing homework.
- Turn off your phone and mobile and put them on voicemail. When it fits into your schedule, respond to the very important ones and leave the rest till later!
- If you find it intolerable to wait in queues, always carry an inspirational book or something to preoccupy yourself. Maybe it's a good time to sort out what's in your bag or look at your schedule tomorrow and get organized for the next day. Or listen to the audible earworms on your iPod to learn a new language. This is also a good time to say your affirmations.
- The next time you start to get aggravated at the dawdling bank teller, the intrusive telesales person, or the disappearing waiter/waitress, imagine that there is a CCTV camera that shows the public a large close up of your face so that every muscle of your impatience is visible. If you don't like that image of yourself then how would you like the world to notice you?
Tips for being patient with yourself
- It's not at all flattering to you when you arrive late to meetings and appointments. Make it a habit to arrive early. This will take a conscious effort on your part to set the alarm clock at an earlier time and make a commitment to get on your journey at least half an hour ahead of time. Visualize yourself being early from now on. If you dread waiting around, think of it as a time to practice patience. You can also pull out that inspirational book, sort out what's in your bag or briefcase, organize your schedule, listen to an audible book on your iPod, say your affirmations or breathe deeply. You will feel more contained, collected, and grounded. This serenity can only boost your self-esteem.
- Really get skilled at this. Become more consciously aware of your impulsiveness and impatience. Count or record how many times during the day you are impatient. Then try to decrease your score! Take deep breaths as an alternative response. We have read that deep breathing can help you lose weight and keep you healthy, thus, the benefits far outweigh the disadvantages of losing your cool. Practice, practice, practice. Yes you can change!
- Don't try to be all things to all people. Give yourself permission to say "No", "I think that will be too much". "I won't really have time to do that". "Sorry, I can't fit that in to my schedule". When you do make plans to meet with someone, make it your goal to really take pleasure in their company. It is easier to enjoy people when you have made the proper time to see them, and you can give them your full attention. It's not enjoyable to others when you are multi-tasking while talking. It doesn't feel good that you can barely fit them into your schedule and you are looking at your watch from the beginning of the encounter. It is better to be fully present and mindful of your friend, child, relative or colleague. It's also the quality of time together that is valuable, not the quantity.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Step 1: Match the Person to the Job.
Step 2: Agree on what is to be done.
Step 3: Explain how the Job Should Be Done.
Step 4: Have Your Employee Repeat Back Instructions.
Step 5: Set a Deadline.
Step 6: Manage by Exception.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
An enthusiastic team is the backbone of success to any company. The biggest challenge is to motivate a team. Unless the team is motivated, you cannot expect success or profits. The team should be constantly forced by the leaders rather then being given autonomy or power to perform its own actions.
Remember that success in business is associated with motivation. Technical skills and knowledge may play a great role but without motivation, everything will fail to work. If you want to get the maximum from your team, you need to ignite or fuel it with the right kind of motivation. This will also provide them the zest to unleash their creativity and bring out their best.
There is a lot that takes to motivate your team. First, you need to want the best for your people. You need to find their need and ambitions in order to know about what motivates them. Once you start motivating them with the right force, you will see them performing their best.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Staying motivated is a struggle — our drive is constantly assaulted by negative thoughts and anxiety about the future. Everyone faces doubt and depression. What separates the highly successful is the ability to keep moving forward.
There is no simple solution for a lack of motivation. Even after beating it, the problem reappears at the first sign of failure. The key is understanding your thoughts and how they drive your emotions. By learning how to nurture motivating thoughts, neutralize negative ones, and focus on the task at hand, you can pull yourself out of a slump before it gains momentum.
Reasons We Lose Motivation
There are 3 primary reasons we lose motivation.
1.Lack of confidence – If you don’t believe you can succeed, what’s the point in trying?
2.Lack of focus – If you don’t know what you want, do you really want anything?
3.Lack of direction – If you don’t know what to do, how can you be motivated to do it?
How to Boost Confidence
The first motivation killer is a lack of confidence. When this happens to me, it’s usually because I’m focusing entirely on what I want and neglecting what I already have. When you only think about what you want, your mind creates explanations for why you aren’t getting it. This creates negative thoughts. Past failures, bad breaks, and personal weaknesses dominate your mind. You become jealous of your competitors and start making excuses for why you can’t succeed. In this state, you tend to make a bad impression, assume the worst about others, and lose self confidence.
The way to get out of this thought pattern is to focus on gratitude. Set aside time to focus on everything positive in your life. Make a mental list of your strengths, past successes, and current advantages. We tend to take our strengths for granted and dwell on our failures. By making an effort to feel grateful, you’ll realize how competent and successful you already are. This will rejuvenate your confidence and get you motivated to build on your current success.
It might sound strange that repeating things you already know can improve your mindset, but it’s amazingly effective. The mind distorts reality to confirm what it wants to believe. The more negatively you think, the more examples your mind will discover to confirm that belief. When you truly believe that you deserve success, your mind will generate ways to achieve it. The best way to bring success to yourself is to genuinely desire to create value for the rest of the world.
The second motivation killer is a lack of focus. How often do you focus on what you don’t want, rather than on a concrete goal? We normally think in terms of fear. I’m afraid of being poor. I’m afraid no one will respect me. I’m afraid of being alone. The problem with this type of thinking is that fear alone isn’t actionable. Instead of doing something about our fear, it feeds on itself and drains our motivation.
If you’re caught up in fear based thinking, the first step is focusing that energy on a well defined goal. By defining a goal, you automatically define a set of actions. If you have a fear of poverty, create a plan to increase your income. It could be going back to school, obtaining a higher paying job, or developing a profitable website. The key is moving from an intangible desire to concrete, measurable steps.
By focusing your mind on a positive goal instead of an ambiguous fear, you put your brain to work. It instantly begins devising a plan for success. Instead of worrying about the future you start to do something about it. This is the first step in motivating yourself to take action. When know what you want, you become motivated to take action.
The final piece in the motivational puzzle is direction. If focus means having an ultimate goal, direction is having a day-to-day strategy to achieve it. A lack of direction kills motivation because without an obvious next action we succumb to procrastination. An example of this is a person who wants to have a popular blog, but who spends more time reading posts about blogging than actually writing articles.
The key to finding direction is identifying the activities that lead to success. For every goal, there are activities that pay off and those that don’t. Make a list of all your activities and arrange them based on results. Then make a make an action plan that focuses on the activities that lead to big returns. To continue the example from above, a blogger’s list would look something like this:
Research relevant topics
Network with other bloggers
Optimize design and ad placements
Answer comments and email
Read other blogs
Keeping track of your most important tasks will direct your energy towards success. Without a constant reminder, it’s easy to waste entire days on filler activities like reading RSS feeds, email, and random web surfing.
When my motivation starts to wane, I regain direction by creating a plan that contains two positive actions. The first one should be a small task you’ve been meaning to do, while the second should be a long-term goal. I immediately do the smaller task. This creates positive momentum. After that I take the first step towards achieving the long-term goal. Doing this periodically is great for getting out of a slump, creating positive reinforcement, and getting long-term plans moving.
It’s inevitable that you’ll encounter periods of low energy, bad luck, and even the occasional failure. If you don’t discipline your mind, these minor speed bumps can turn into mental monsters. By being on guard against the top 3 motivation killers you can preserve your motivation and propel yourself to success
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Having developed a Personal Mission *and* a Mission Statement for My Business, I would say this from my personal experience (and from teaching this in class):
Developing a statement of mission is one of the most meaningful endeavors you can undertake.
** Several Up Front Suggestions **
1. Take the time to do it . and it does take time. I've spent hours getting mine to say and "feel" what I desire to communicate to myself.
2. Do NOT write a book. It should be brief enough to review quickly and yet say enough to motivate and inspire you. In my opinion, it should be brief enough to memorize easily and motivating enough to inspire you for the long haul.
3. Beware of common phrases: don't over use them. Remember, the key issue is *personal motivation.* (Unless, of course, the common phrase is significantly meaningful and motivational for you).
Become the person I *value* becoming?
** It Doesn't Have To Be For Life! **
** In The End This Is What You Want **
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Well, it certainly doesn't single out anyone, hence avoiding public embarrassment. But how do you think staff will react? First, each and every person in the room will wonder if they've somehow offended the boss. That's ALWAYS the first reaction to what we call "insinuation". The next reaction is: "Oh, right, Maria must be talking about Jethro (or some other coworker." Perhaps more serious is the effect this type of communication has on trust. Because of the lack of clarity and ambiguity, it wouldn't be surprising if staff began to doubt the boss's honesty or straightforwardness.
Insinuation isn't used only by managers. Many people use it rarely. Some people use it often. Each use of insinuation increases distrust, damages the work environment and has the potential to trigger very destructive conflict.
So, what's insinuation? Insinuation refers to a statement that is ambiguous, vaguely put, and generally negative. The nature of insinuation is that it is deniable, and that's one reason why people use it. It avoid addressing issues straight up and directly, and therein lies its destructiveness. The use of insinuation pushes solutions much farther away because it disguises the issue, and creates additional mistrust.
Here's another example. Over coffee Mark is talking to Fred, one of his coworkers. Mark says: "I don't want to name names but it's pretty obvious that someone around here isn't interested in anything but his own job." Can anything good come from this? I doubt it. It isn't meant to SOLVE the problem. It isn't being discussed with the right person (who would obviously be the person that remains unnamed). It's just sneaky, deniable back-stabbing.
Second, take some responsibility. If you have a concern, then have the courage to take it up with the person in question, in private, and try to work it out. Don't snipe from afar. If private conversations fail, then it may be appropriate to bring it up in a more public setting, but present it in the spirit of solving a problem, and make sure you take responsibility for your comments and opinions.
Third, understand that people use insinuation when they feel uncomfortable with expressing their anger or frustration, but can't discipline themselves to keep their mouths shut. Or, perhaps their frustration levels are so high, they aren't thinking clearly. If you are tempted to insinuate, ask yourself this question: "Am I saying this in the spirit of trying to solve a problem, or am I saying this because of some selfish motive or because I'm too uncomfortable to approach this constructively? If it's the latter, don't say it.
Finally, keep in mind that every time you use insinuation you will be seen as less courageous, more manipulative and less trustworthy by the majority of people who hear you. This applies even for people who might “congratulate you" on your insinuation, for they, too will realize that your next target might be them.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
I realized today that I have a healthy body which was under some suspicion of proper functionality in the last few weeks. I realized today I have a disciplined father who is punctual, the rarest of qualities in human beings and someone whom I despised for 26 long years. I realized today I have the best mom, who just drinks down the venom of my anger on a daily basis like sweet nectar and yet pours her unconditional love, day in & day out. I realized today I have a loving aunt who cares for me even more dearly than my mother. I realized today money crunches are no more a topic of worry for me, as god somehow and from somewhere gives me the exact amount that needs to be paid. I realized today I have a lovely young brother who is mature and courageous who I always thought was a little too careless for his age. I realized today how people are selfish and take innocent trusting people for a ride but are equally aggressive at getting their rights. I realized today I have a lovely hardworking staff who are too naïve to understand how the human mind works and I always attributed it to their casualness. I realized today I can inspire. I realized today I have a powerful successful business.
I realized today I have to be more focused on revenue generation. I realized I have to be healthy, I realized I have to teach and train the people around me than just expect them to subconsciously think like I do.
I realized today I have to be more responsible in every moment that I breathe….
I realized today!!! Boy what a realization!!!!!
9.23 pm., Mangal Aarambh
July 21st, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Look what we’ve done to ourselves. God blessed us with gifts innumerable. Our intelligence, good health, our talent, our rightful thinking, our just heart, our soul with a grateful smile.
We have abused it with ill thinking, with reasons selfish and self fulfilling. Our thoughts from positivity slide to the most evil at the blink of an eyelid. In every situation we see what is it that I have to gain. In every action a desire to be reciprocated better by someone is expected, in every deed a selfish ulterior motive is hidden. I wonder, are we what we are or do we pretend to be what we are not? Does our dreams manifest into mindless cravings or do we derive sadistic pleasure in others fall. I wonder.
I have always believed each soul is unique gifted with the power to excel, succeed and win. Yet, we compare ourselves with others in measurements that are petty. For every soul is unique, so will every capability each soul is granted be. We struggle to succeed, make money and see who finishes first.
I ask, shall life be not more merrier and happier if we just accept ourselves, love what we have and then focus on accomplishing what we are unique at?
Why the race? Why the competition? Why the unnatural jealousy that god did not create us for?
Why don’t we just learn to love ourselves? Why don’t we just learn to love others uniqueness and success? Why don’t we just learn from others uniqueness? Wouldn’t life be more colorful in all its brightest sunshine and wouldn’t we be more beautiful from inside and not just the exterior?
Let us learn to love ourselves and continuously expand our capabilities on a daily basis. Let us learn to love others. Let us learn to mark our own benchmarks beyond our imagination irrespective of others milestones.
Let us just learn everyday of what new can be done towards our work, relationships, family, friends, and our soul.
Lets us just focus on being a fresh and a new happy soul everyday. A soul that spreads warmth, happiness without any expectations into others life like a morning sun ray. Let us be a new us everyday.
I pledge today to be a new me everyday!!
10 pm, Mangal Aarambh, 20th july 2009.
The following strategies have help you cope with stress and ease panic attacks. They will be helpful to you in many ways.
Eat small, healthy meals every 2 hours throughout the day. Keep safe snacks with you at all times in case you get stuck waiting. In addition, keep yourself hydrated!
Stimulants - simple sugars, caffeine, and cigarettes - can cause you to feel the symptoms of a panic attack and, for some people, can actually cause panic attacks. Limiting or eliminating your use of these stimulants can help to eliminate panic attacks.
Learn to breathe deeply. During a panic attack or in the midst of a fearful moment, people tend to take frequent shallow breaths. This style of breathing may cause you to experience tingling in our hands and feet and to feel light-headed. Taking slow, deep breaths can calm you. Put your hand on your stomach and breathe in so that your stomach expands. Practice this. After you learn how, try taking three breaths in this way whenever you experience stress: breathe in for a count of 8 and out for a count of 7.
Learn Creative Visualization Techniques
Creative visualization allows you to escape the stress of the moment and create a different reality. You can even fool your body into believing it is experiencing the vision in your head instead of the reality in the present. Visualize sitting in a calm environment - at the beach or in the mountains. Imagine yourself taking a vacation or succeeding at a challenge. Use these creative visualizations to cope with panic, to image success in stressful situations, and to provide yourself with a break from the stress of daily life. As with deep breathing, the more you practice, the better you will be able to utilize this tool in the midst of a panic attack.
Practice Relaxation Exercises
To progressively relax yourself, find a quiet corner of your home and lie on the floor. Beginning with your toes, tense and relax each muscle group in your body - from your toes to your head. When you are completely relaxed, take a moment to notice how you feel. The more you practice this, the better you will be able to recall this feeling in the midst of a panic episode or a stressful situation.
Participating in daily exercise, such as walking, can relieve stress and alleviate panic attacks. Make the time doubly effective by using your walk as a time for prayer or meditation. Start your walk with a question to God about your life, an affirmation about yourself ("I am loved," "I am okay," "I am a survivor."), or a simple prayer ("Thank You," "Bless this moment," "Guide me.").
Research by psychologist James Pennebaker has shown that people who used writing to make sense of their traumatic life experiences had the long-lasting effect of feeling happier and less anxious. Pick up an inexpensive notebook. Every morning, take fifteen minutes to dump all of your negative, stressful stuff into that notebook. Write three pages of this stuff. At the end of writing about what is difficult, write five experiences or people or situations that you are grateful for. (For example, "I am grateful that I am alive," "I am grateful that the sky was a beautiful shade of blue," "I am grateful for the smiles of children.")
Carry a small notebook in your purse. Just as you begin to experience the symptoms of panic or stress, write down the following: the situation you are in, the sensations you are feeling in your body, the thoughts you are thinking now and the thoughts you were thinking before experiencing the first symptoms, your present feelings and what you were feeling before the symptoms began. As you do this, remind yourself that what you are experiencing does not define you - it is simply something that is happening. You are not the symptom. This exercise can help you, over time, to pinpoint the causes of your panic attacks. It can also relieve the symptoms of panic attacks.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
- Believe that you can be wealthy. Ignore all of the negative talk about how you can't do it. Just take action and the wealth will gradually fall into place.
- Be willing to take stock of your life. Eliminate the bad habits and replace them with productive ones. Being productive is one of the steps to wealth that cannot be eliminated.
- Remove yourself from negative environments and negative people. These scenarios do nothing but keep you down and sap your energy. Take responsibility for your actions and channel it in ways that will help you to create wealth.
- You will need to create a plan that you can follow to get to the wealthy place in your life.
- Focus and stick to the plan that you have. Being able to focus is another one of the steps to wealth that is key to getting ahead.
- Work hard and gradually take steps to getting wealth. Don't overload yourself with a lot of stuff. That will cause you to lose focus. Take your time and eventually the profits will come.
- As you become wealthy, be willing to help others that are where you were before you became wealthy.
- One of the most important steps to wealth is to give freely. Don't just give freely of your time, but also give freely of your money. Give to your church and other charities. When you give freely, you will also receive the same way.
- Take control of your life and keep yourself healthy. You can't create wealth when you are ailing and not in the best shape.
- In addition to taking action, keep a positive attitude and don't let anything get you down. There will be times when things may not go your way, but you have to keep going.
Using these steps to create wealth will help you go far financially. It's a process that you have to go through in order to get to the next level in your life.
The ability to convert ideas to things is the secret to outward success - Henry Ward Beecher
Friday, July 17, 2009
- Be humble and polite to your co-workers and others.
- Do not criticize anyone. That is not your job.
- Always be professional and do not take any thing personal.
- Do not break the client dress code. It is not a good idea to go to the office in jeans and sneakers even if they have a casual dress code.
- Light cologne is fine but do not use strong perfume.
- Do not talk loudly when you talk over the phone or to your collegues. Talk in a soft and clear voice.
- If you have any dental problems, make a dental appointment with your dentist. If dental problems go unchecked, they lead to embarassing situations involving bad breath. Have breath mints, chewing gum or peanuts in your desk. Check your breath before talking to your collegues personally.
- Wear fresh and neat clothes.
- Always be punctual.
- Complete your assigned task within the time frame. Do not postpone it.
- Do not talk about politics and religion in the office premisis.
- If you are invited for a happy hour party or any party try to attend it atleast for some time. That is the best place to know more about your collegues.
- Do not play music loudly.
- Be as easy going. Do not get the "tough guy" label.
- Attend meetings regularly.
- Be enthusiastic.
- Try to be helpful to your co-workers.
- Be a good listener. Do not interrupt when someone else is talking.
- Discuss but do not argue.
- Do not lose your credibility
I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to what light I have.- Abraham Lincoln
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Controlling your temper isn't always easy. But these effective anger management tips will help give you the upper hand.
Do you find yourself fuming when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure go through the roof when your child won't cooperate? Anger is a normal and even healthy emotion, but learning how to deal with it in a positive way is important.
Uncontrolled anger can make both you and other people feel lousy. If your outbursts, rages or frustrations are negatively affecting relationships with family, friends, co-workers or even complete strangers, it's time to learn some anger management skills. Anger management techniques are a proven way to help change the way you express your anger.
10 tips to help get your anger under control
- Take a 'timeout.' Although it may seem cliche, counting to 10 before reacting really can defuse your temper.
- Get some space. Take a break from the person you're angry with until your frustrations subside a bit.
- Once you're calm, express your anger. It's healthy to express your frustration in a nonconfrontational way. Stewing about it can make the situation worse.
- Get some exercise. Physical activity can provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you're about to erupt. Go for a brisk walk or a run, swim, lift weights or shoot baskets.
- Think carefully before you say anything. Otherwise, you're likely to say something you'll regret. It can be helpful to write down what you want to say so that you can stick to the issues. When you're angry, it's easy to get sidetracked.
- Identify solutions to the situation. Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work with the person who angered you to resolve the issue at hand.
- Use 'I' statements when describing the problem. This will help you to avoid criticizing or placing blame, which can make the other person angry or resentful — and increase tension. For instance, say, "I'm upset you didn't help with the housework this evening," instead of, "You should have helped with the housework."
- Don't hold a grudge. If you can forgive the other person, it will help you both. It's unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.
- Use humor to release tensions. Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Don't use sarcasm, though — it's can hurt feelings and make things worse.
- Practice relaxation skills. Learning skills to relax and de-stress can also help control your temper when it may flare up. Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself, such as "Take it easy." Other proven ways to ease anger include listening to music, writing in a journal and doing yoga.
"If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow." Chinese Proverbs
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Most of us might have complained about our memory one time or other. But some of you have been frequently complaining about your poor memory. When we generally talk about poor memory we are really talking about poor recollection. Recollection is possible only if the content is retained in memory. This is possible only if we have recorded it into memory. That is, unless we have not assimilated, we cannot recall at all. That is why William James and many others give emphasis to how we record things into our memory.
Even if we record something correctly in our memory, we may not be able to recall it. This is due to many reasons, the main reasons being problems in retention and stress. The former can be solved by systematic revision and the latter by practicing some Stress Management Techniques .
Perhaps Chunking is the oldest method used in memorization. In this method, the items to be memorized are divided into small and easily memorizable chunks or groups. This method works best when the order of the items is not important.
This method is found to be particularly well suited for memorizing multi-digit numbers (eg., ID nos., telephone nos., etc.) and for committing complicated spellings to memory.
- The number 472627607 may be memorized easily if it is grouped as 472, 627,607 or as 47, 26, 27,607.These chunks may then be learned by rote. Learning and retention are much facilitated if you further explore the nos. by finding some relationship among these different chunks. The more explorations or relations you do, the better.
- Words like mathematics may be divided into mat +he +mat +ics, Together may be divided into to + get + her; Important may be divided into im + port + ant. This technique will make us learn much faster.
- The list Apple, cucumber, paper, ink, cabbage, banana, grapes, beans, stapler, orange can be better learned by rearranging and applying chunking as :-Apple, banana, grapes, orange, cucumber, cabbage, beans, paper, ink, stapler-- 4 fruits, 3 vegitables and 3 stationary items.
If possible, organize the material as meaningfully as you can and think out relationships among each group. This not only improves learnability and retention but also aids in faster and effortless recollection.
Psychologists doing research on Human Memory have found that the capacity of Short Term Memory (STM) for humans is 7± 2 that is from the range 5 to 9 items. So you should take care to keep the chunks you create within this limit.
This is also one of the popular and oldest methods in memorization. This technique makes use of the fact that we have a natural tendency to remember rhymes and rhythms. The following is a very popular example of application of this technique which almost all school students are familiar with.
"Thirty days haveth September
April, June and November
All the rest have thirty-one
February has twenty-eight alone
Except in leap year, then the time
When Febs days are twenty-nine."
If possible create rhymes like this and it will not only aid in improving your memory but in improving your creativity as well.
In this method, a bridge is built in between the items given to be memorized. This technique is best suited for learning material involving word pairs or material that can be reduced to word pairs. An example often cited by memory experts is the learning of the capital of Poland. The capital of Poland is Warsaw. World War II started with Germany's attack on Poland. Thus it may be arranged as Poland SAW War first.
Here, the word pair to be connected together is Poland and Warsaw. The additional information of the World War II is used as a bridge or mediator in bringing these two words together.
Again, like other techniques, the mediation technique calls for the learner's active participation in the learning process. This is because one is to bring in the mediator or the bridge from relevant items one has learned.
In this technique, you do your recital or rote learning just before going to bed. The mind in the process of sleeping would then arrange the information in a systematic and effective way when you are sleeping. Psychologists have also found that if you sleep after thinking about your problems there is a better chance that you arrive at a solution the next day.
- Be in a relaxed mood
- Write down the things that you are supposed to remember in a piece of paper.
- Read it aloud (if possible) once or twice and recite it two to three times.
- Now go to sleep without worrying or thinking about anything.
- You will surely retain the item longer and find it more easy to recall it when in need.
Trying by Not Trying
All of us apply this method knowingly or unknowingly. Sometimes when you try to recall you may not be able to recall it at that time even if you are sure that you know it very well. You experience a blocking that prevents you from recalling it. Normally you tend to try again and again but in vain. To handle this situation you just keep away from trying to recollect it and do something else; to your pleasant surprise that information automatically pops up into your mind after some time. This is because even if you stopped trying, the mind is searching for that information and brings it to awareness when it is found. Sometimes the information was blocked when you wanted, and mind brings it forward when the blocking is removed. This is where stress plays its role in hindering recall.
If you are very anxious by nature or very stressful in nature, you may encounter this type of blockage very often. In such case, it is highly recommended that you practise some kind of relaxation technique and thus keep your anxiety and stress away. This is very important because this behavior can bring many undesirable psychological and physiological conditions. You may even consult a Clinical Psychologist in extreme cases.
"All improvement in memory consists of one's habitual method of recording facts" - Dr. William James, Father of American Psychology
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Any worthwhile, challenging goal requires sustained effort.Doing the things necessary for a day or two isn't hard. Where most people fall down is in stringing those days together and thereby creating the progress, the momentum, and ultimately, the successful accomplishment.
What follows are ten ways to maintain your focus, your energy and your optimism while pursuing your goal. They've worked for me and they'll work for you. When I've employed all of these components, I've never failed to achieve my intention.
- Have Powerful Reasons. With a strong enough reason you can and will find the how and the wherewithal to achieve your reward. Reasons plus belief keep you motivated. When you're excited about your goal, it doesn't seem like work. If you're not excited, your efforts will require more discipline and energy. Make sure it's YOUR goal. Make sure it excites you. And then act enthusiastically.
- Write Your Objectives Down. This is a critical step. Don't think it, ink it. When you write your goals down, they appear not only on paper, but they become indelibly written upon your consciousness.
- Visualize. "See" your objective already in existence. Nothing can withstand the power of a clear, multi-sensory vision of what you are intending. What does it look like? What will people be saying about it? How will you feel? The more detailed and "real" you can make your vision, the more powerful it will be. It will operate like a magnet and draw forth all kinds of things you never thought possible.
- Affirm Your Success. Speak your goal into existence. An affirmation is a present-tense, positive statement of your intended outcome. I now have achieved ______________ (fill in the blank). The more sensory rich you can make your affirmations, the more effective they will be. All of these techniques help you to feel the presence of your objective and build belief.
- Make a Plan of Action. To achieve and stay focused upon your objective, create an action plan. What are the steps you will take to get you from where you are to where you want to be? Your strategies will likely change as you go along, so set your goals in concrete and your plans in sand. Keep your eye on the goal, but remain flexible in your path to it.
- Measure Your Progress. You can't change what you don't measure. Create mechanisms that will allow you to see your progress. Use charts. Log your actions. Use anything that will encourage you by allowing you to objectively track your progress. We all need feedback—it's the breakfast of champions.
- Maintain a Support System. Have a Master Mind Group. Use the Buddy System. Surround yourself with people who will encourage and challenge you. Be accountable to someone other than yourself. Read positive books. Review past successes.
- Focus On Only a Few Goals at a Time. You can achieve anything you desire, but not EVERYTHING you desire. Concentrate your efforts and your energy on just a few. I might have dozens of goals and projects, but I keep three key goals in the forefront of my mind.
- Take Action Every Day. An important objective warrants daily attention. A 400-page novel is not written all at once. To many, writing a 400-page novel would be overwhelming. But a little over a page a day will get it done in a year. Every goal can be broken down into doable tasks done consistently.
- Celebrate Your Milestones. Mark your successes and acknowledge yourself for your progress. As you achieve one goal, you can see better and believe more easily in the accomplishment of others. You deserve to succeed and you deserve to celebrate your successes.
Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.- Albert Einstein
Monday, July 13, 2009
In this newsletter, you learn the difference between a positive and negative worldview. You learn how to benefit from your mistakes and how to remain positive in the face of adversity.
InThis is achieved through the simple exercise of self-disclosure. For you to truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by things that may have happened in your past, you must be able to disclose yourself to at least one person. You have to be able to get those things off your chest. You must rid yourself of those thoughts and feelings by revealing them to someone who won't make you feel guilty or ashamed for what has happened.
Using Stumbling Blocks as Stepping Stones
There are two ways to look at the world: the benevolent way or the malevolent way. People with a malevolent or negative worldview take a victim stance, seeing life as a continuous succession of problems and a process of unfairness and oppression. They don't expect a lot and they don't get much. When things go wrong, they shrug their shoulders and passively accept that this is the way life is and there isn't anything they can do to make it better.
On the other hand, people with a benevolent or positive worldview see the world around them as filled with opportunities and possibilities. They believe that everything happens as part of a great process designed to make them successful and happy. They approach their lives, their work, and their relationships with optimism, cheerfulness, and a general attitude of positive expectations. They expect a lot and they are seldom disappointed.
Fear Nothing. Achieve Greatness. Live Financially Free. With the skills I will teach you, you'll see that success is inevitable and nothing is out of your reach. I designed this program for individuals serious about getting immediate results.
Flex Your Mental Muscles
When you develop the skill of learning from your mistakes, you become the kind of person who welcomes obstacles and setbacks as opportunities to flex your mental muscles and move ahead. You look at problems as rungs on the ladder of success that you grab onto as you pull your way higher.
Two of the most common ways to deal with mistakes are invariably fatal to high achievement. The first common but misguided way to handle a mistake is the failure to accept it when it occurs. According to statistics, 70 percent of all decisions we make will be wrong. That's an average. This means that some people will fail more than 70 percent of the time, and some people will fail less. It is hard to believe that most of the decisions we make could turn out to be wrong in some way. In fact, if this is the case, how can our society continue to function at all?
Cut Your Losses
The fact is that our society, our families, our companies, and our relationships continue to survive and thrive because intelligent people tend to cut their losses and minimize their mistakes. It is only when people refuse to accept that they have made a bad choice or decision-and prolong the consequences by sticking to that bad choice or decision-that mistakes become extremely expensive and hurtful.
Learn From Your Mistakes
The second common approach that people take with regard to their mistakes, one that hurts innumerable lives and careers, is the failure to use your mistakes to better yourself and to improve the quality of your mind and your thinking.
Learning from your mistakes is an essential skill that enables you to develop the resilience to be a master of change rather than a victim of change. The person who recognizes that he has made a mistake and changes direction the fastest is the one who will win in an age of increasing information, technology and competition.
By remaining fast on your feet, you will be able to out-play and out-position your competition. You will become a creator of circumstances rather than a creature of circumstances.
Now, here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, imagine that your biggest problem or challenge in life has been sent to you at this moment to help you, to teach you something valuable. What could it be?
Second, be willing to cut your losses and walk away if you have made a mistake or a bad choice. Accept that you are not perfect, you can't be right all the time, and then get on with your life.
Third, learn from every mistake you make. Write down every lesson it contains. Use your mistakes in the present as stepping stones to great success in the future.
"Relax and allow affirmations to go through your subconscious mind!"According to whole brain research, you can learn subjects quite rapidly as a result of deep relaxation and music used in a systemized, organized process. Because of this, it is also possible for you to learn new belief systems using the same techniques.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Similarly, pessimists may be excessively defensive, and people used to a very logical approach to problem solving may fail to engage their creativity or listen to their intuition.If you look at a problem using the Six Thinking Hats technique, then you'll use all of these approaches to develop your best solution. Your decisions and plans will mix ambition, skill in execution, sensitivity, creativity and good contingency planning.
This tool was created by Edward de Bono in his book "6 Thinking Hats".
Each "Thinking Hat" is a different style of thinking. These are explained below:
- White Hat: With this thinking hat, you focus on the data available. Look at the information you have, and see what you can learn from it. Look for gaps in your knowledge, and either try to fill them or take account of them.This is where you analyze past trends, and try to extrapolate from historical data.
- Red Hat : Wearing the red hat, you look at the decision using intuition, gut reaction, and emotion. Also try to think how other people will react emotionally, and try to understand the intuitive responses of people who do not fully know your reasoning.
- Black Hat: When using black hat thinking, look at things pessimistically, cautiously and defensively. Try to see why ideas and approaches might not work. This is important because it highlights the weak points in a plan or course of action. It allows you to eliminate them, alter your approach, or prepare contingency plans to counter problems that arise.
Black Hat thinking helps to make your plans tougher and more resilient. It can also help you to spot fatal flaws and risks before you embark on a course of action. Black Hat thinking is one of the real benefits of this technique, as many successful people get so used to thinking positively that often they cannot see problems in advance, leaving them under-prepared for difficulties.
- Yellow Hat : The yellow hat helps you to think positively. It is the optimistic viewpoint that helps you to see all the benefits of the decision and the value in it, and spot the opportunities that arise from it. Yellow Hat thinking helps you to keep going when everything looks gloomy and difficult.
- Green Hat : The Green Hat stands for creativity. This is where you can develop creative solutions to a problem. It is a freewheeling way of thinking, in which there is little criticism of ideas. A whole range of creativity tools can help you here.
- Blue Hat : The Blue Hat stands for process control. This is the hat worn by people chairing meetings. When running into difficulties because ideas are running dry, they may direct activity into Green Hat thinking. When contingency plans are needed, they will ask for Black Hat thinking, and so on.
You can use Six Thinking Hats in meetings or on your own. In meetings it has the benefit of defusing the disagreements that can happen when people with different thinking styles discuss the same problem. A similar approach is to look at problems from the point of view of different professionals (e.g. doctors, architects, sales directors) or different customers.
Friday, July 10, 2009
To lift a heavy object, you have a choice: use leverage or not. You can try to lift the object directly – risking injury – or you can use a lever, such as a jack or a long plank of wood, to transfer some of the weight, and then lift the object that way.
Which approach is wiser? Will you succeed without using leverage? Maybe. But you can lift so much more with leverage, and do it so much more easily!
So what has this got to do with your life and career?
The answer is "a lot". By applying the concept of leverage to business and career success, you can, with a little thought, accomplish very much more than you can without it. Without leverage, you may work very hard, but your rewards are limited by the hours you put in. With leverage, you can break this connection and, in time, achieve very much more.
Levers of Success
So how can you apply leverage to your career? And how can you achieve much more, while – if you choose to – reducing the number of hours that you work?
To do this, you'll need to learn how to use the leverage of:-
- Time (yours and that of other people).
- Knowledge and education.
Using the leverage of time is the most fundamental strategy for success. There are only so many hours in a day that you can work. If you use only your own time, you can achieve only so much. If you leverage other people's time, you can increase productivity to an extraordinary extent.
To leverage YOUR OWN time.
- Practice effective time management. Eliminate unnecessary activities, and focus your effort on the things that really matter.
- As part of this, learn how to prioritize, so that you focus your energy on the activities that give the greatest return for the time invested.
- Use goal setting to think about what matters to you in the long term, set clear targets, and motivate yourself to achieve those targets.
To leverage other people's time.
- Learn how to delegate work to other people.
- Train and empower others.
- Bring in experts and consultants to cover skill or knowledge gaps.
- Outsource non-core tasks to people with the experience to do them more efficiently.
Providing that you do things properly, the time and money that you invest in leveraging other people's time is usually well spent. Remember, though, that you'll almost always have to "pay" up front in some way in order to reap the longer-term benefits of using leverage.
You can also exert leverage by getting the most from your assets, and taking full advantage of your personal strengths.
You have a wide range of skills, talents, experiences, thoughts, and ideas. These can, and should, be used in the best combination. What relevant skills and strengths do you have that others don't? How can you use these to best effect, and how can you improve them so that they're truly remarkable? What relevant assets do you have that others don't? Can you use these to create leverage? Do you have connections that others don't have? Or financial resources? Or some other asset that you can use to greater effect?
A good way of thinking about this is to conduct a personal SWOT analysis, focusing on identifying strengths and assets, and expanding from these to identify the opportunities they give you. (An advantage of SWOT is that it also helps you spot critical weaknesses that need to be covered.)
Knowledge and Education Leverage
Another significant lever of success is applied knowledge. Combined with education and action, this can generate tremendous leverage.
Learning by experience is slow and painful. If you can find more formal ways of learning, you'll progress much more quickly. What's more, if you select a good course, you'll have a solid foundation to your knowledge, and one that doesn't have high-risk gaps. This is why people working in life-or-death areas (such as architects, airline pilots, medical doctors and suchlike) need long and thorough training. After all, would you want to be operated on by an unqualified surgeon?
While few of us operate in quite such immediately critical areas, by determining what you need to know, and then acquiring that knowledge, you can avoid many years of slow, painful trial and error learning.
In the same way, it's inefficient if many people in an organization have to learn how to do their work by trial and error. A much better way is for organizations to capture the knowledge gained by the first few in some way and pass it on to others. The keys to successfully leveraging knowledge and education are: firstly, knowing what you need to learn; secondly knowing to what level you need to learn it; thirdly, being very focused and selective in your choices; and fourthly, in taking the time to earn the qualifications you need.
Even then, having more education or more knowledge isn't necessarily a point of leverage. These become advantages only when they can be directly applied to your career goals and aspirations--and when they're used actively and intelligently to do something useful.
Finding technology leverage is all about thinking about how you work, and using technology to automate as much of this as you can.
At a simple level, you might find that all you need to keep you in touch with home and work is a laptop computer. Alternatively, a personal digital assistant (PDA) can help you maintain a single, convenient, properly-backed-up time management system. Cell phones that access email and browse the web are handy tools for making the best of your downtime during working hours or while traveling.
If you're a slow typist, voice recognition software can help you dictate documents and save time. Tools like Google Desktop Search (http://desktop.google.com/) can help you manage and find documents in such a way that you no longer need to file digital documents. And Google itself provides a great, quick way of finding relevant information online.
At a more sophisticated level, you may find that you can use simple desktop databases like Microsoft Access to automate simple work processes. If you do a lot of routine data processing (for example, if you run many similar projects) you can find that this saves you a great deal of time. More than this, you only need to set up a process once with a tool like this - afterwards the process will be executed the same way each time, by whomever initiates the process (this reduces training, meaning that new team members can become productive much more quickly, meaning that you can scale your operations – and your success – more quickly.)
Businesses can choose from a wide array of software solutions. Some of these can automate or simplify tasks that are otherwise very time-consuming. Customer relationship management (CRM) databases can bring tremendous benefits for sales and customer service organizations, as can point-of-sale (PoS) inventory systems for organizations that need to track and manage inventory. Websites and web-based catalogs can give clients easy access to up-to-date product information, and help them place orders simply and easily. And blogs and email-based newsletters help people stay in contact with thousands of people quickly and easily. All of these use technology to provide tremendous leverage.
"Give me a lever long enough and a place to stand, and I can move the Earth."- Archimedes
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Creative visualization is a mental technique that uses the imagination to make dreams come true. Used in the right way, creative visualization can improve our life and attract success and prosperity. It is a power that can alter our environment and circumstances, cause events to happen, and attract money, possessions, work, people and love into our life. Creative visualization uses the power of the mind, and is the power behind every success.
By visualizing a certain event or a situation, or an object, such as a car, a house, furniture etc, we attract it into our life. It is a process that is similar to daydreaming. For some people it might look like magic, but there is no magic involved, only the natural process of the power of thoughts and natural mental laws. It is like having a genie at your disposal!
There are people who use this technique naturally in their everyday affairs, not being aware that they are using some sort of power. All successful people use it consciously or unconsciously, attracting the success they want into their life, by visualizing their goals as already accomplished.
Making Creative Visualization Work
- Define your goal.
- Think, meditate and listen to your intuition to ascertain that you really desire to attain this goal.
- Ascertain that only good will result from your visualization, for you and for others.
- Sit alone in a quiet place, where you will not be disturbed.
- Relax your body.
- Breathe rhythmically and deeply several times.
- Visualize a clear and detailed mental image of what you desire to get or accomplish.
- Use in your imagination all the five senses of sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste.
- Add desire and feelings into what your mental image.
- Visualize at least twice a day, about 10 minutes each time.
- Persevere with your visualization, day after day, with, patience, hope and faith.
- Stay positive, thinking positive thoughts, feeling positive feelings and using positive words.
- During the day, when negative thoughts and doubts arise, replace them with positive thoughts. As each negative thought enters your mind, immediately substitute it with a positive thought.
- Keep an open mind, so that you recognize opportunities and take advantage of them.
- After concluding your visualization session, say attentively and earnestly, "Let everything happen in a harmonious and favorable way for all involved".
Our thoughts and feelings, and the mental images we carry in our mind, affect our life. By changing them we change our life. This means that we have to be careful with our thoughts and how we feel about them, otherwise we might get things and enter into situations that you do not want, and then we will have to find ways to get rid of them. Better think and visualize what that we really and truly want, and which will improve our life.
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.- Eleanor Roosevelt
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
At the highest levels of the martial arts there is a test given to those who apply to become a master. Following hours of intensive skill demonstration, both in solitary forms and in combat with multiple opponents, the student is asked to sit in complete stillness on the floor. A thin glass rod is then placed in his hands and he is given the simple instruction, "Bend without breaking."
Over the next several hours the student must bend the glass rod, using a careful combination of pressure, heat from his hands, and patience.
Are the circumstances of your life or your job forcing you to change, perhaps even to the point of breaking? If so, then the lessons of this simple, but demanding test can help you master the challenges you face.
Apply constant gentle pressure.
Most students who hold the glass rod break it within the first few minutes. Because they are anxious to finish and see the end result, they unconsciously apply more and more pressure until the sound of the rod suddenly snapping in their hands signals their failure.
When the requirements of your job are changing, it's easy to believe that you must master every new aspect immediately. Not only is this impossible, it can overwhelm you to the point that you lose your ability to perform even in areas where you were already strong. Focusing on too many changes at the same time will ultimately lead you to break, in your results, and in your confidence.
Instead, identify the few most important changes you must master and then build a plan for the daily or weekly improvements that will lead you to that level. Designate a specific objective for each week, such as practicing a new skill for a certain number of hours or reading background material, and then build your confidence by consistently accomplishing it.
Approaching a significant change through small adjustments will not only lead you to the outcome you want more quickly, it will make you stronger in the process.
Use the heat of your inner fire.
Pressure alone would not allow the glass rod to bend. The martial artist knows that it is the heat from his hands that also enables the result to be achieved.
Every time you allow your mind to dwell on thoughts about what has happened to you, whether or not it was fair, or who was to blame, you are literally dousing the inner fire that is essential to your success. These thoughts, whether true or not, place you in the role of victim - a role from which you will never generate the heat needed to change.
Instead, use the power of your mind to reinforce the outcome you truly want: success in this new chapter of your life.
The most powerful way to shift your thinking is through gratitude. Each time you are tempted to focus on your difficulties, simply begin to list all the things for which you are grateful. While it may feel awkward at first, saying phrases such as "I am grateful for my family. I'm grateful for my health. I'm grateful to have a job and the ability to support the people I care about, etc," will literally transform your thoughts and will give you the energy and optimism you need to change.
Real change takes time. You cannot force a plant to grow faster by commanding it to hurry. Most often, the pressure you are placing on yourself is actually greater than any that is being placed on you by others.
By making a plan for consistent progress, and harnessing the power of your thoughts to keep your confidence strong, you will have the tools you need. All that remains is to give yourself time to make them work.
No matter how dire your challenges may seem today, they are just as likely to represent the beginning of a great new chapter in your life for tomorrow - one where the changes you are making are a needed prerequisite. By using the lessons of gentle pressure, inner fire, and patience, you will be able to adapt and move into the future that is waiting for you.
Every day do something that will inch you closer to a better tomorrow - Doug Firebaugh